The Reason Why I Fired My Secretary

[jasonbellevue]

Two weeks ago was my forty-fifth birthday, and I wasn't feeling
too hot that morning anyway. I went to breakfast knowing my wife
would be pleasant and say “Happy Birthday,” and probably have a
present for me.

She didn't even say “Good Morning,” alone any “Happy Birthday.”
I thought, “Well, that's wives for you. Maybe the children will remember.”

The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word.

When I started to the office I was feeling pretty low and despondent.
As I walked into my office, my secretary, Janet, said, “Good morning boss,
Happy Birthday.” And I felt a little better; someone had remembered.

I worked until noon. Then Janet knocked on my door and said,
“You know, it's such a beautiful day outside and it's your birthday,
let's go to lunch, just you and me.” I said, “By George, that's the
best thing I've heard all day. Let's go.”

We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go; we went
out into the country to a little private place. We had two martinis
and enjoyed lunch tremendously.

On the way back to the office, she said,“You know, it's such a beautiful day.
We don't need to go back to the office, do we?” I said, “No, I guess not.”
She said, “Let's go to my apartment.” After arriving at her apartment she said,
“Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip
into something more comfortable.”

“Sure,” I excitedly replied. She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes,
she came out carrying a big birthday cake, followed by my wife, children and
dozens of our friends.

All were singing “Happy Birthday” and there on the couch I sat... naked.