Please vote for me in the Dad-Joke Olympics

[Porsche]

I am thinking of entering the “Dad-Joke Olympics”.
I reckon I have a good chance of getting a medal…

Here’s my material…


'I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I'll tell you what, never again”

‘I watched a documentary on how ships are held together. Riveting.’

'I know a couple who get on like a house on fire. They both feel trapped and are slowly suffocating to death.'

''I was playing chess with my friend and he said “Let's make this more interesting”. So we stopped playing chess.'

“Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.”

"Two cannibals eating a clown. One says, 'Does this taste funny to you?'"

‘You know who gives kids a bad name? Bob Geldorf.’

‘My wife and I watched 3 DVD’s back-to-back last night – luckily I was the one facing the TV’

‘I entered the Sun-Tanning Olympics – I got Bronze.’

‘I needed an eight character password – so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.’