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padi56 · 12 January 2006, 10:22 PM

TEN THOUGHTS TO PONDER ON.

Number 1- Life is sexually transmitted,and a universally terminal condition. Remember people are mass-produced, by sometimes unskilled labour.

Number 2 - Work is the slow dragging of fingernail on the blackboard of life.

Number 3 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see a man without an erection,make him a sandwich. If its Paul make him two

Number 4 - Give someone a fish and you feed them for a day; teach someone to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

Number 5 - Karaoke is a Japanese word meaning 'Tone Deaf'.

Number 6- There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one of them works.

Number 7 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Number 8 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred pounds and a substantial tax cut saves you twenty pounds?

Number 9- In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006:
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We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in the United Kingdom. But we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Ministry of Agriculture (DEFRA) in charge of immigration.

12 January 2006, 10:22 PM	#1
padi56 "TRF" Life Patron Join Date: Jun 2005 Real Name: Peter Location: Llanfairpwllgwyng Watch: ing you. Posts: 53,044	Thoughts To Ponder. TEN THOUGHTS TO PONDER ON. Number 1- Life is sexually transmitted,and a universally terminal condition. Remember people are mass-produced, by sometimes unskilled labour. Number 2 - Work is the slow dragging of fingernail on the blackboard of life. Number 3 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see a man without an erection,make him a sandwich. If its Paul make him two Number 4 - Give someone a fish and you feed them for a day; teach someone to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks. Number 5 - Karaoke is a Japanese word meaning 'Tone Deaf'. Number 6- There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one of them works. Number 7 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. Number 8 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred pounds and a substantial tax cut saves you twenty pounds? Number 9- In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal. AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006: . . . . . . . . We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in the United Kingdom. But we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Ministry of Agriculture (DEFRA) in charge of immigration. __________________ ICom Pro3 All posts are my own opinion and my opinion only. "The clock of life is wound but once, and no man has the power to tell just when the hands will stop. Now is the only time you actually own the time, Place no faith in time, for the clock may soon be still for ever." Good Judgement comes from experience,experience comes from Bad Judgement,.Buy quality, cry once; buy cheap, cry again and again. www.mc0yad.club Second in command CEO and left handed watch winder

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