I Shall Not (a thought)

[lavaman]

I shall not retreat.

I shall not give in to the voices of anger, hatred, and fear. I shall choose instead, the only rational thing I can: love. Not love in the hearts & heat sense of the word. But rather, some form of respect. That I will not ask you how you voted last year before reminding you that you are about to drive off with your $6 cup of joe on your roof. That I won’t call the cops when your new puppy keeps me up until 3 a.m. For a week. That I won’t ask where you are going on Sunday. Or vote for anyone that asks you either.

I shall not yield my ground.

I will give you a wave when we pass on the trail. I will smile and say “Thanks” if you glimpse my tattoos. I will give you a nod when I am on my Indian and you pass by on your KLR. I will open the door not because you are a lady, but because I aspire to be a gentleman. I will bite my tongue when I hear your music. And when you reach for your wallet while you are in uniform, you may find that your money is no good.

I shall not surrender.
My beliefs. That we all bleed the same. That we can disagree, clash in our ideas, in our beliefs, without clashing with our fists. That we share the same pale blue dot. That we are all some woman’s child. And that one day, our hearts will stop, our minds will quiet, and our cells will burst. And all that’s left is what we did. The rest is just faith, hope, and all the other magnificence that the 3 ½ pound car battery in our skulls can conjure.

I know what it is to be brave. People think it is savage weapons. I’ve carried those. There is nothing brave about that whatsoever, and some of the time I was scared as hell. Real courage is silent. It whispers. And it seldom earns anyone a parade. Or even a hotdog. It’s not always the popular thing. In fact often it’s the least popular option of all. It’s just there, waiting for you to claim it. And if in my little act of defiance I should lose my life in a random act of rage to someone who lacks my convictions, so be it. I am still fighting fires, it seems.

We journey together. Charge the line!

©The Lavaman