Girls Coffeeshop Talk

[Tarheel]

Originally Posted by Incurable

tattoos. In particular, "tramp stamps". . . . Would you let your teen daughter get one or not?

I definitely would not give a teenager permission to get something permanent like that. But you know how teenagers are - if they just show up with one, there isn't much you can do about it.

The temporary ones are definitely fun - I've gotten those when on vacation at the beach.

My mom is an OBGYN, and she has told me lots of stories about patients whose tatoos started to look like bruises as they aged and their skin lost elasticity. Apparently, if you are going to get one, you should get it where the skin is really taught, like on your ankle bone.

[Tarheel]

Originally Posted by away36

Just a little aside.......we all seem to drift in and out of here. We seem to drop in, post a whole whack of nonsense, then get tied up with family stuff or life stuff....or just have a severe attack of the "meh's!" and have nothing to say, although we drop in regularly and read other people's posts...so if you don't see us for a day or so....don't worry....we re-appear like next month's mortgage payment!

Gotcha. I have periods at work when I have time to play around on the computer a bit, and others when I barely have time to go get unch, so I'll probably fit well into your pattern of dropping in and out.

I was home sick yesterday and today, so I've had lots of time to cruise around the TRF boards. You can only watch so much TV before you feel like you are losing your mind. Before yesterday, I had no idea The People's Court was still on the air!!!

[Carolina]

Pat and Lisa, I'm with you on the tattoo issue. They're just not my cup of tea for either gender. Same goes for piercings.

Although, the temporary tattoos are a lot of fun!

[Ashley]

I would like a tattoo, but the problem is, I can't think of anything that I would want on my body permanently. I get bored of things so quickly, I'd be so worried I would find something I really like, then realize two months later that I'm sick of it and it was a mistake. That, and my mom and boyfriend would kill me
Piercings though... I wanted to get so many things done. I've always been a fan of back corsets, and arm ladders. Then I realized I would never get the type of job I want (or professional respect, for that matter) with the piercings I want. So I didn't get them either.

Makes me seem so boring!

[Lisa]

Originally Posted by Tags_girl_

I would like a tattoo, but the problem is, I can't think of anything that I would want on my body permanently. I get bored of things so quickly, I'd be so worried I would find something I really like, then realize two months later that I'm sick of it and it was a mistake. That, and my mom and boyfriend would kill me
Piercings though... I wanted to get so many things done. I've always been a fan of back corsets, and arm ladders. Then I realized I would never get the type of job I want (or professional respect, for that matter) with the piercings I want. So I didn't get them either.

Makes me seem so boring!

Nah... you're on the right track to hold off.... just take a look at what Pat said; it sums things up nicely. Being interesting and "un-boring" has nothing to do with body adornment. It's all in the noggin. Word from an oldster who used to be a youngster!

[Ashley]

Originally Posted by Lisa

Nah... you're on the right track to hold off.... just take a look at what Pat said; it sums things up nicely. Being interesting and "un-boring" has nothing to do with body adornment. It's all in the noggin. Word from an oldster who used to be a youngster!

I prefer to have nice clothes/shoes/purses rather than anything permanent. I love changing things up!

[Lisa]

Originally Posted by Tags_girl_

I prefer to have nice clothes/shoes/purses rather than anything permanent. I love changing things up!

Yes, true that. I should amend my comment to "permanent" body adornment. Purses/shoes/clothes are definitely a great way to express yourself!

[Carolina]

Originally Posted by Tags_girl_

I prefer to have nice clothes/shoes/purses rather than anything permanent. I love changing things up!

Hey, I agree!

[redshirt1957]

Originally Posted by Lisa

Yes, true that. I should amend my comment to "permanent" body adornment. Purses/shoes/clothes are definitely a great way to express yourself!

Originally Posted by Carolina

Hey, I agree!

Thongs and speedos for me! Especially at the beach with my naturally grown sweather. There went the appetite(s).

[Ashley]

Originally Posted by redshirt1957

Thongs and speedos for me! Especially at the beach with my naturally grown sweather. There went the appetite(s).

Like this?

[JJ Irani]

Originally Posted by Tags_girl_

Like this?

[away36]

Originally Posted by redshirt1957

Thongs and speedos for me! Especially at the beach with my naturally grown sweather. There went the appetite(s).

That must be the beach area where there is such a high incidence of non-accidental drownings.

[Ashley]

Originally Posted by away36

That must be the beach area where there is such a high incidence of non-accidental drownings.

[JJ Irani]

Originally Posted by away36

That must be the beach area where there is such a high incidence of non-accidental drownings.

[redshirt1957]

Good one Ashley. My only question is why he borught peanuts to thebeach?

[Incurable]

Originally Posted by Lisa

Nah, I'm with you about the tats, Pat. We adore the temporary tattoos and even Baby Violet is sporting a few at the moment (a woman at the plant nursery today commented on Violet's and thought they were real! Egad!). I hope that by the time my girls are old enough to get one that tattoos aren't the fad they are now. If wanting to express oneself individuality is the reason for getting a tattoo, I would argue that they are now so commonplace you'd really just be following the crowd. And I don't care what people say, and you can call me old fashioned and closed-minded, but I agree that the human form is not enhanced with tattoos. They're really more of a distraction and, well, just tacky.

So how about piercing? What if one of my kids wants a nose stud or eyebrow ring? I suppose we'll cross that bridge when we come to it, but I hope that the upbringing I've tried to give them would allow them to think critically and make wise decisions on their own. My 8 year old says she'll never pierce even her ears, and that's okay with me! I did mine when I was 16 but haven't worn earrings now for about 8 years.

Oh - so what did the 20-something have to say about tattoos?

As for piercings... that's another one I have mixed feelings about. Part of me winces when I see a 2-3 year old w/ears pierced already and wearing earrings. Bad on Mom. Teens and grown women w/pierced ears don't bother me. Too many and in the weirdest places however, makes me wonder why... Probably hypocritical of me as the person themselves are really at the core of things but... at some instinctual level, some things I find attractive, others not. Kids nowadays seem to revel in shock-value embellishments. As Chris Rock said, "Just because you can steer a car with your feet, that doesn't make it a good idea...".

Peer pressure and identity searching are all part of being a teen. If they could only realize, regardless of how many spikes, bones, woolly mammoth tusks, etc. they decide to decorate their bodies with, you're still just you. Having good self esteem is the key. Seeking things out of a feeling of lacking is a sad thing, IMO. Don't tell the advertisers of the world this. It may just put them out of business. Enough reverie...

[Lisa]

Originally Posted by Incurable

As for piercings... that's another one I have mixed feelings about. Part of me winces when I see a 2-3 year old w/ears pierced already and wearing earrings. Bad on Mom. Teens and grown women w/pierced ears don't bother me. Too many and in the weirdest places however, makes me wonder why... Probably hypocritical of me as the person themselves are really at the core of things but... at some instinctual level, some things I find attractive, others not. Kids nowadays seem to revel in shock-value embellishments. As Chris Rock said, "Just because you can steer a car with your feet, that doesn't make it a good idea...".

Peer pressure and identity searching are all part of being a teen. If they could only realize, regardless of how many spikes, bones, woolly mammoth tusks, etc. they decide to decorate their bodies with, you're still just you. Having good self esteem is the key. Seeking things out of a feeling of lacking is a sad thing, IMO. Don't tell the advertisers of the world this. It may just put them out of business. Enough reverie...

Yikes - when I lived in San Antonio so many tiny babies had their ears pierced. My pediatrician said it was a cultural thing - give them their hepatitis immunization at two months of age and pierce the ears. Don't get me started! I mean, from the baby's point of view, all she knows is that someone is hurting her and making her uncomfortable for weeks to come. What if I took my baby into Home Depot and asked them to shoot a nail gun into the skin between her thumb and first finger? Do you think they'd call me insane and haul me out of there? If I did it, wouldn't I be headline news and certainly arrested for child abuse? Yet, I could go to the mall and hang out at Claire's Boutique and watch Mommy and Daddy hold their screaming infant down while the nice smiling clerk shoots studs through the baby's earlobes. That Claire's incident did actually happen, and the mom and dad weren't exactly appreciative of my observations that they were causing their baby a lot of unecessary pain.

As for the advertisers - well, don't you think they are reaping a huge benefit by preying on the insecurities of their young audience? What incentive is there for them not to?

I sure hope I can help influence my kids to think for themselves and not give a rat's patootie about what their peers think they should do. I can't think of much else more important than that.

[Ashley]

I got my ears pierced when I was too young to remember it, and I'm glad my mom did it that way. Because when they grew over and I had to repierce them, I definitely remembered. I wished that I just kept the original holes so I wouldn't have to redo it.
I guess it is a cultural and personal thing. I'll probably pierce my young girls ears, just so they don't have to do it later.

For those who don't agree with ear piercing at a young age, what about circumcision? Would you want to wait for your son to grow up and make the choice for himself? Or do it when he won't ever remember the pain?

(I know that it's quite different, I just wonder if there is any personal correlation)

[East Bay Rider]

My son has long(ish) hair. He thinks it's cool and the young girls in his crowd do too. I'm forever reminding him that it's only hair and he would still be cool if it was cut short. He's also athletic and I remind him that sports do not make him who he is just as his hair doesn't. He's too young to fully "get it" but in time (maybe if he hears it enough) he'll understand. Thankfully he's not obsessed with his image or clothes. He just likes his hair (and the female attention).
Unfortunately "image" is very important to kids and they often let others opinions define their self image.

[East Bay Rider]

Originally Posted by Tags_girl_

...what about circumcision? Would you want to wait for your son to grow up and make the choice for himself? Or do it when he won't ever remember the pain?

(I know that it's quite different, I just wonder if there is any personal correlation)

Young.
I don't believe that all the pain receptors are developed in babies.
Ever seen a baby with a glob of yuk in their eye? Smiling and happy like they don't even know it's there. Meanwhile adults are wincing in pain if an eyelash or speck of dust falls in their eye.
The pediatrician told me that if an adult had to endure the teething process they would need anesthesia and possibly surgery. Meanwhile kids get through it with discomfort and baby oragell.

[Ashley]

Originally Posted by East Bay Rider

My son has long(ish) hair. He thinks it's cool and the young girls in his crowd do too. I'm forever reminding him that it's only hair and he would still be cool if it was cut short. He's also athletic and I remind him that sports do not make him who he is just as his hair doesn't. He's too young to fully "get it" but in time (maybe if he hears it enough) he'll understand. Thankfully he's not obsessed with his image or clothes. He just likes his hair (and the female attention).
Unfortunately "image" is very important to kids and they often let others opinions define their self image.

Luckily hair can be very easy to change!

[Lisa]

Originally Posted by Tags_girl_

I got my ears pierced when I was too young to remember it, and I'm glad my mom did it that way. Because when they grew over and I had to repierce them, I definitely remembered. I wished that I just kept the original holes so I wouldn't have to redo it.
I guess it is a cultural and personal thing. I'll probably pierce my young girls ears, just so they don't have to do it later.

For those who don't agree with ear piercing at a young age, what about circumcision? Would you want to wait for your son to grow up and make the choice for himself? Or do it when he won't ever remember the pain?

(I know that it's quite different, I just wonder if there is any personal correlation)

Well, at least I can say I'm somewhat consistent in my rantings! Circumcision: No - if any of our kids had been boys we wouldn't have had them circumcised. Ear piercing: Maybe a baby won't remember the pain (though I've read in some of my hubby's literature that there is emerging evidence babies can be affected in far-reaching ways by pain), but I think it's more important to let the child decide for herself when she's older. A little pain isn't such a big deal, especially when you're looking forward to wearing those great earrings and it was your choice. And who knows? Not all girls automatically want their ears pierced. I'm not sure I would assume all of my daughters will do so. I won't steer them either way. Of course, all just my opinions. And I am probably too opinionated on some things.

[Incurable]

Originally Posted by Tags_girl_

Luckily hair can be very easy to change!

Not when you don't have any... or are folliculary challenged (PC term for bald). Sure, given the choice I'd opt for a full head of hair but, guess what, not gonna happen. It'd be kind of useless of me to beat myself up over it. It's another example of cultural/social pressure. I see ads for things like 'Hair Club for Men' and I feel sorry for those who feel compelled to buy into that crap. Lame. If a woman chooses to raise her nose at my lack of hair then I have no interest in her anyways. I could just as easily choose to ignore all else and judge her by the size of her bra but that wouldn't make me very smart, would it. Beauty is much more complex than that... I'm certainly not immune to visuals but without the rest, well...

[Lisa]

Originally Posted by Incurable

Not when you don't have any... or are folliculary challenged (PC term for bald). Sure, given the choice I'd opt for a full head of hair but, guess what, not gonna happen. It'd be kind of useless of me to beat myself up over it. It's another example of cultural/social pressure. I see ads for things like 'Hair Club for Men' and I feel sorry for those who feel compelled to buy into that crap. Lame. If a woman chooses to raise her nose at my lack of hair then I have no interest in her anyways. I could just as easily choose to ignore all else and judge her by the size of her bra but that wouldn't make me very smart, would it. Beauty is much more complex than that... I'm certainly not immune to visuals but without the rest, well...

Think of all the poor guys out there who are trying everything and anything to have their hair back... all the millions and millions of dollars spent... even opting for surgery... on something that's only important because society says it should be. I think that by far the vast majority of women would MUCH prefer a bald guy who didn't worry about being bald. I mean, who cares?

[JJ Irani]

Originally Posted by Lisa

I think that by far the vast majority of women would MUCH prefer a bald guy who didn't worry about being bald. I mean, who cares?

Thanks, Lisa.....just like my Zemina. When we met, she was just 20 and I was 23.....and I already had a receeding hairline.

She knew I would eventually turn bald, but didn't care. I guess my gift of the gab won her over.....so she still keeps on saying!!

[Lisa]

Look what you have to look forward to! This is the cutest ever!


http://video.yahoo.com/watch/1181237/4213664

[Lisa]

Originally Posted by JJ Irani

Thanks, Lisa.....just like my Zemina. When we met, she was just 20 and I was 23.....and I already had a receeding hairline.

She knew I would eventually turn bald, but didn't care. I guess my gift of the gab won her over.....so she still keeps on saying!!

JJ, photoshop abominations aside, you just wouldn't be wonderful YOU if ya had hair! In fact, I'm just almost certain I might not like you quite as much!

[JJ Irani]

Originally Posted by Lisa

Look what you have to look forward to! This is the cutest ever!


http://video.yahoo.com/watch/1181237/4213664

Very cute, Lisa......I tried something similar with my little Annika when she was about the same age and got a similar kind of reaction from her!!

[JJ Irani]

Originally Posted by Lisa

JJ, photoshop abominations aside, you just wouldn't be wonderful YOU if ya had hair! In fact, I'm just almost certain I might not like you quite as much!

WOW!! Thanks so much for the nice words, Lisa.....you've just made my weekend!!

[Lisa]

Originally Posted by JJ Irani

WOW!! Thanks so much for the nice words, Lisa.....you've just made my weekend!!

Glad to hear it, JJ. On that note, I think I'd better turn in. It's after midnight, and I'm not that sleepy yet but I know three little people who will be up with the chickens in the morning....

'Night, everyone.