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Old 16 June 2009, 10:30 PM   #1
figbo
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Mustard anyone?

As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection: a thick slab of ham on a fresh bun with crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, Gourmet Mustard.

The corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the table in our backyard, picked it up with both hands, but was stopped by my wife suddenly at my side.

'Here, hold Johnny ( our six-week-old son) while I get my sandwich,' she said.

I had him balanced between my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching again for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my fingers.

I love mustard...





I had no napkin.

I licked it off.

It was not mustard

No man ever put a baby down faster.

It was the first and only time I have sprinted with my tongue protruding out.

With a washcloth in each hand, I did the sort of routine shoeshine boys do, only I did it on my tongue.

Later, after she stopped crying from laughing so hard, my wife said, 'Now you know why they call that fancy mustard 'Poupon.''
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Old 16 June 2009, 10:53 PM   #2
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.............
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Old 16 June 2009, 11:12 PM   #3
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Old 16 June 2009, 11:16 PM   #4
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Very funny but at your expense!!!
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Old 17 June 2009, 01:14 AM   #5
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Old 17 June 2009, 07:11 AM   #6
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Old 17 June 2009, 02:07 PM   #7
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Old 17 June 2009, 02:24 PM   #8
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Old 17 June 2009, 02:38 PM   #9
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Old 17 June 2009, 04:50 PM   #10
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Old 24 July 2011, 01:04 AM   #11
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Old 24 July 2011, 02:45 AM   #12
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Old 25 July 2011, 11:29 PM   #13
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Old 26 July 2011, 01:12 AM   #14
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