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padi56 · 8 June 2012, 10:47 PM

Didn't like shopping there anyway. Yesterday I was at my local Sainsbury's store buying a large bag of Winalot dog food for my loyal pet and was in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an Elephant? So, since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Winalot dog biscuit diet again. I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in hospital last time, but I'd lost 2 stone before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in queue was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked me if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off the kerb to sniff an Irish Setter's arse and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard. I'm now banned from Sainsbury's.

dalip · 8 June 2012, 10:53 PM

Puffy · 8 June 2012, 10:55 PM

hahahaha this had me in tears on a conference call!!!!

now being forced to copy and forward it on

FeelingTheBlues · 9 June 2012, 12:09 AM

This one is such a classic!

kxux · 9 June 2012, 12:12 AM

This is great. Tell me it's a real story.

Lmbeauleap · 9 June 2012, 12:30 AM

DCgator · 9 June 2012, 01:14 AM

Classic Padi!

HAGW....

Rsvrider · 9 June 2012, 01:16 AM

Dr. Robert · 9 June 2012, 02:01 AM

cedargrove · 9 June 2012, 03:23 AM

That is good.

11618 · 9 June 2012, 03:58 AM

rotfl

Darlinboy · 9 June 2012, 04:37 AM

mjclark32 · 9 June 2012, 04:54 AM

Hahahaha

TSW · 9 June 2012, 05:08 AM

Hazelnut · 9 June 2012, 05:22 AM

That is hilarious!

BH13GMT · 9 June 2012, 05:47 AM

Corking gag!

bewithabob · 9 June 2012, 06:53 AM

ok, but but is the Irish Setter OK?

MoBe · 9 June 2012, 12:21 PM

Rockrolex · 9 June 2012, 12:27 PM

I shared the story with Arleen. We laughed so hard we were nearly crying. I almost couldn't get to the last line from ROTFLMAO.

swatty · 9 June 2012, 06:35 PM

Sarajevo · 10 June 2012, 09:05 AM

Great joke that stands the test of time.

byeedo · 11 June 2012, 02:45 AM

mitchy · 12 June 2012, 01:55 AM

77T · 16 June 2012, 02:45 PM

somatic · 17 June 2012, 02:02 AM

Lol

8 June 2012, 10:47 PM	#1
padi56 "TRF" Life Patron Join Date: Jun 2005 Real Name: Peter Location: Llanfairpwllgwyng Watch: ing you. Posts: 53,044	Banned from Sainsbury's Didn't like shopping there anyway. Yesterday I was at my local Sainsbury's store buying a large bag of Winalot dog food for my loyal pet and was in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had an Elephant? So, since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Winalot dog biscuit diet again. I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in hospital last time, but I'd lost 2 stone before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in queue was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked me if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off the kerb to sniff an Irish Setter's arse and a car hit me. I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. I'm now banned from Sainsbury's. __________________ ICom Pro3 All posts are my own opinion and my opinion only. "The clock of life is wound but once, and no man has the power to tell just when the hands will stop. Now is the only time you actually own the time, Place no faith in time, for the clock may soon be still for ever." Good Judgement comes from experience,experience comes from Bad Judgement,.Buy quality, cry once; buy cheap, cry again and again. www.mc0yad.club Second in command CEO and left handed watch winder

8 June 2012, 10:53 PM	#2
dalip "TRF" Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Real Name: Dalip Location: Mumbai and Perth Watch: Rolex PAM Omega Posts: 18,656	__________________ ------------------------------------------------------------ *"The liar's punishment is not in the least that he is not believed, but that he cannot believe anyone else." George Bernard Shaw*

8 June 2012, 10:55 PM	#3
Puffy "TRF" Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Here and there Posts: 12,485	hahahaha this had me in tears on a conference call!!!! now being forced to copy and forward it on __________________ Fine Quality is Long Remembered After the Pain of Spending Money is Forgotten

9 June 2012, 12:09 AM	#4
FeelingTheBlues "TRF" Member Join Date: Sep 2011 Real Name: Carl Location: Always moving Watch: If you wish... Posts: 22,039	This one is such a classic! __________________ Mon corps c'est un pays en guerre sur l'point d'finir, Le général de l'armée de terre s'attend au pire, J'ai faim, j'ai frette, je suis trop faible pour me lever debout, On va hisser le drapeau blanc un point c'est tout. - André Fortin

9 June 2012, 01:16 AM	#8
Rsvrider "TRF" Member Join Date: Dec 2011 Location: Dallas TX Watch: It cming frm above Posts: 807	__________________ "The Only Easy Day Was Yesterday"

9 June 2012, 12:12 AM	#5
kxux 2024 ROLEX DATEJUST41 Pledge Member Join Date: Feb 2012 Real Name: Jan Location: PA Watch: GMT II Posts: 1,110	This is great. Tell me it's a real story.

9 June 2012, 12:30 AM	#6
Lmbeauleap "TRF" Member Join Date: Feb 2012 Location: Wisconsin Watch: Franken Posts: 437

9 June 2012, 01:14 AM	#7
DCgator "TRF" Member Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: PNW Watch: DS,BLNR,SubLV,DJ2 Posts: 8,123	Classic Padi! HAGW....

9 June 2012, 02:01 AM	#9
Dr. Robert 2024 SubLV41 Pledge Member Join Date: Dec 2009 Real Name: Bob Location: U.S.A. Watch: 1655 Posts: 64,092	__________________ Founder & Card Carrying Member of the Global Association of Retro-Grouch-Curmudgeons

9 June 2012, 03:23 AM	#10
cedargrove "TRF" Member Join Date: Dec 2010 Real Name: Rich Location: Canada Watch: Milgauss, GMT IIc Posts: 3,013	That is good.

9 June 2012, 03:58 AM	#11
11618 Member Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: UK Posts: 406	rotfl

9 June 2012, 04:37 AM	#12
Darlinboy 2024 SubLV41 Pledge Member Join Date: Apr 2011 Real Name: DB Location: :noitacoL Watch: :hctaW Posts: 6,703	__________________ Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit.

9 June 2012, 04:54 AM	#13
mjclark32 "TRF" Member Join Date: Mar 2010 Real Name: MJC Location: PHL USA Watch: IWC, Rolex, AP Posts: 29,232	Hahahaha __________________

9 June 2012, 05:08 AM	#14
TSW "TRF" Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Real Name: TSW Location: Le Brassus Watch: Rolex & AP's Posts: 27,449	__________________ AP Owners Club IG @swiss.watch.connection

9 June 2012, 05:22 AM	#15
Hazelnut "TRF" Member Join Date: Feb 2012 Real Name: David Location: Los Angeles Watch: SubC Date Posts: 242	That is hilarious!

9 June 2012, 05:47 AM	#16
BH13GMT "TRF" Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Real Name: Paul Location: UK, Dorset Watch: and learn Posts: 2,636	Corking gag! __________________ Rolex Sub 1680, Rolex GMT 116710LN, Rolex Datejust 16220 Salmon Dial (the Mrs), Tudor BB58, Tudor Pelagos Blue and Several Seiko's ************************************************ *************** "last one in the chopper is a rotten egg" Jonathan Quayle Higgins III

9 June 2012, 06:53 AM	#17
bewithabob "TRF" Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Real Name: Bob Location: Dallas, Texas Watch: Daytona Meteorite Posts: 3,417	ok, but but is the Irish Setter OK? __________________ meteor flying to Earth onto my wrist... 116509 Daytona Meteorite, 116520 Daytona Black, 116710 GMTIIC, 16013 DATEJUST, CARTIER SANTOS 100 W20090X8, IWC Big Pilot, IWC Top Gun "Everything works out in the end. If it hasn't worked out, it's not the end."

9 June 2012, 12:21 PM	#18
MoBe "TRF" Member Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Canada Posts: 6,773

9 June 2012, 12:27 PM	#19
Rockrolex TRF Moderator & 2024 SubLV41 Patron Join Date: May 2005 Real Name: God Location: Washington, D.C. Watch: What do you think? Posts: 37,953	I shared the story with Arleen. We laughed so hard we were nearly crying. I almost couldn't get to the last line from ROTFLMAO. __________________ Despite the high cost of living, it's still very popular. *Tosser Cabinet Member* Official Member: 'Perpetual 30' Vegas International GTG 2016 Official Member "WIS-CON" Las Vegas International GTG 2017 Official Member "WIS-CON" Las Vegas International GTG 2018 Official Member "WIS-CON" Las Vegas International GTG 2019

9 June 2012, 06:35 PM	#20
swatty 2024 SubLV41 Pledge Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Real Name: Peter Location: Sydney Watch: The Game Posts: 17,415

10 June 2012, 09:05 AM	#21
Sarajevo "TRF" Member Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: The Netherlands Watch: 16600371701 Posts: 1,271	Great joke that stands the test of time.

11 June 2012, 02:45 AM	#22
byeedo "TRF" Member Join Date: Mar 2012 Real Name: Brian Location: usa Watch: Milgauss GV Posts: 688

12 June 2012, 01:55 AM	#23
mitchy "TRF" Member Join Date: Apr 2010 Real Name: Mitch Location: . Watch: 116710LN Posts: 2,495	__________________ Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted John Lennon

16 June 2012, 02:45 PM	#24
77T 2024 SubLV41 Pledge Member Join Date: Dec 2010 Real Name: PaulG Location: Georgia Posts: 41,953	__________________ Does anyone really know what time it is?

17 June 2012, 02:02 AM	#25
somatic Member Join Date: Jul 2011 Real Name: Jeff Location: Las Colinas, TX Watch: President Posts: 51	Lol

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