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padi56 · 19 January 2014, 08:39 PM

Everybody who has a dog calls him Rover or Lassie. I called mine Sex. Now Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for Sex. He said "I would like to have one too" then I said "but this is a dog" He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said "but you don't understand I have had Sex since I was 9 years old. He replied that I must have been quite a kid.

When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the hotel clerk I wanted a room for me and my wife and a separate room for Sex. He said every room in this place is for sex. I said "you don't understand. Sex keeps me awake all night" and the clerk replied "me too".

I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me that I could have sold tickets for that "but you don't understand, I hope to have Sex on T.V." He called me a Show off.

When my wife and I separated we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said "Your honor I had sex before we were married". The judge said "me too". Then I told him that after we were married sex left me. He replied "me too".

Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around for him. A cop came over and asked me "What are you doing wandering around the alley at 4 am for?" I replied "I am looking for Sex" My case comes up in court on Monday,

samsmart · 19 January 2014, 09:35 PM

Now this was worth waking up early for. Awesome! :D

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Foxy1 · 19 January 2014, 10:32 PM

Love it

cop414 · 19 January 2014, 10:45 PM

mjclark32 · 19 January 2014, 11:05 PM

Hahahahaha

anilzat · 20 January 2014, 12:43 AM

An oldie but a goodie. :)

asadtiger · 20 January 2014, 01:10 AM

Cc1966 · 20 January 2014, 02:34 AM

Jazz · 20 January 2014, 02:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by padi56

Everybody who has a dog calls him Rover or Lassie. I called mine Sex. Now Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for Sex. He said "I would like to have one too" then I said "but this is a dog" He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said "but you don't understand I have had Sex since I was 9 years old. He replied that I must have been quite a kid.

When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the hotel clerk I wanted a room for me and my wife and a separate room for Sex. He said every room in this place is for sex. I said "you don't understand. Sex keeps me awake all night" and the clerk replied "me too".

I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me that I could have sold tickets for that "but you don't understand, I hope to have Sex on T.V." He called me a Show off.

When my wife and I separated we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said "Your honor I had sex before we were married". The judge said "me too". Then I told him that after we were married sex left me. He replied "me too".

Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around for him. A cop came over and asked me "What are you doing wandering around the alley at 4 am for?" I replied "I am looking for Sex" My case comes up in court on Monday,

Very good! 😂😂😂

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Hairdude1 · 20 January 2014, 03:01 PM

Very funny

southtexas · 21 January 2014, 02:20 AM

Funny!

GRabens · 21 January 2014, 11:23 AM

I am in tears laughing so hard....lol

Bangel · 21 January 2014, 08:28 PM

Peter, I trust having Sex in your house doesn't leave the place too messy?!

19 January 2014, 08:39 PM	#1
padi56 "TRF" Life Patron Join Date: Jun 2005 Real Name: Peter Location: Llanfairpwllgwyng Watch: ing you. Posts: 53,250	My Dog Named ###. Everybody who has a dog calls him Rover or Lassie. I called mine Sex. Now Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for Sex. He said "I would like to have one too" then I said "but this is a dog" He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said "but you don't understand I have had Sex since I was 9 years old. He replied that I must have been quite a kid. When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the hotel clerk I wanted a room for me and my wife and a separate room for Sex. He said every room in this place is for sex. I said "you don't understand. Sex keeps me awake all night" and the clerk replied "me too". I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me that I could have sold tickets for that "but you don't understand, I hope to have Sex on T.V." He called me a Show off. When my wife and I separated we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said "Your honor I had sex before we were married". The judge said "me too". Then I told him that after we were married sex left me. He replied "me too". Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around for him. A cop came over and asked me "What are you doing wandering around the alley at 4 am for?" I replied "I am looking for Sex" My case comes up in court on Monday, __________________ ICom Pro3 All posts are my own opinion and my opinion only. "The clock of life is wound but once, and no man has the power to tell just when the hands will stop. Now is the only time you actually own the time, Place no faith in time, for the clock may soon be still for ever." Good Judgement comes from experience,experience comes from Bad Judgement,.Buy quality, cry once; buy cheap, cry again and again. www.mc0yad.club Second in command CEO and left handed watch winder

19 January 2014, 10:32 PM	#3
Foxy1 "TRF" Member Join Date: Mar 2013 Real Name: Steve Location: Everywhere Watch: Love them all Posts: 1,503	Love it __________________ There is only one difference between a madman and me. The madman thinks he is sane. I know I am mad. Salvador Dali

19 January 2014, 10:45 PM	#4
cop414 TRF Moderator & 2025 Titanium Yacht-Master Patron Join Date: Apr 2012 Real Name: Tim Location: Pennsylvania Watch: 14060M Posts: 72,959	__________________ Rolex Submariner 14060M Omega Seamaster 2254.50 DOXA Professional 1200T Card carrying member of TRF's Global Association of Retro-Grouch-Curmudgeons TRF's "After Dark" Bar & Night Club Patron P Club Member #17 2 FA ENABLED

19 January 2014, 11:05 PM	#5
mjclark32 "TRF" Member Join Date: Mar 2010 Real Name: MJC Location: PHL USA Watch: IWC, Rolex, AP Posts: 29,232	Hahahahaha __________________

20 January 2014, 02:34 AM	#8
Cc1966 "TRF" Member Join Date: Aug 2013 Real Name: Christopher Location: Georgia, USA Watch: ing the Sea... Posts: 6,713	__________________ "I wish to have no Connection with any Ship that does not Sail fast for I intend to go in harm's way." Captain John Paul Jones, 16 November 1778 "*Curmudgeons* " Favorites: 1665 SD, Sub Date, DSSD, Exp II, Sub LV, GMTIIc

19 January 2014, 09:35 PM	#2
samsmart "TRF" Member Join Date: Jun 2013 Real Name: sam Location: Dallas, TX Watch: Me Tint Posts: 3,777	Now this was worth waking up early for. Awesome! :D Sent from my SPH-L720 using Tapatalk 2

20 January 2014, 12:43 AM	#6
anilzat Banned Join Date: Sep 2013 Real Name: John Williams Location: Alaska outback Watch: GMT Posts: 1,051	An oldie but a goodie. :)

20 January 2014, 01:10 AM	#7
asadtiger "TRF" Member Join Date: May 2007 Real Name: Asad A. Awan Location: kabul, Afghanista Watch: Tissot PRX Posts: 2,698

20 January 2014, 03:01 PM	#10
Hairdude1 "TRF" Member Join Date: Apr 2012 Real Name: Alex Location: Chicago Watch: AP,PP, Rolex Posts: 37,156	Very funny

21 January 2014, 02:20 AM	#11
southtexas 2025 TitaniumYM Pledge Member Join Date: May 2011 Location: Great State of TX Posts: 5,799	Funny! __________________ Forty six & 2 are just ahead of me. Follow me on Instagram @ccrolex

21 January 2014, 11:23 AM	#12
GRabens "TRF" Member Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: FL Watch: Too Many Rolex! Posts: 594	I am in tears laughing so hard....lol

21 January 2014, 08:28 PM	#13
Bangel "TRF" Member Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: Australia Watch: 116610LN Posts: 15,802	Peter, I trust having Sex in your house doesn't leave the place too messy?!

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