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padi56 · 15 May 2006, 12:09 AM

Subject: Cave

MEMORANDUM
From: Bin Laden, Osama
To: All Al Quieda Fighters
Subject: The Cave

Hi guys.

We've all been putting in long hours recently but we've really come together as a group and I love that. However, while we are fighting a jihad, we can't forget to take care of the cave. And frankly I have a few concerns -

First of all, while it's good to be concerned about cruise missiles, we should be even more concerned about the dust in our cave. We want to avoid excessive dust inhalation, (a health and safety issue) - so we need to sweep the cave daily, I've done my bit on the cleaning rota........ have you? I've posted a sign-up sheet near the cave reception area (next to the halal toaster).

Second, it's not often I make a video address but when I do, I'm trying to scare most of the world population, OK? That means that while we're taping, please do not ride your scooter in the background or keep doing the 'Wassup'thing. Thanks.

Third: Food. I bought a box of Dairy-lea recently, clearly wrote
"Ossy" on the front, and put it on the top shelf. Today, two of my Dairy-lea slices were gone. Consideration. That's all I'm saying.

Fourth: I'm not against team chanting and all that, but, we must distance ourselves from the Westerner's bat and ball games...it's just not cricket. Please do not chant "Ossy Ossy Ossy, Oy Oy Oy" every time I ride past on the donkey. Thanks

Five: Graffiti:Whoever wrote Ossie f#cks donkeys! on the group toilet wall please clean it off...it's a lie anyway, the donkey backed into me, whilst I was relieving myself at the edge of the mountain.

Six: The use of chickens, is strictly for food. Assam, the old excuse that the "chicken backed into me, whilst I was relieving myself at the edge of the mountain" will not be accepted in future. Bestiality with non halal chicken is forbidden...there is a grey area with donkeys however.

Finally, we've heard that there may be Western soldiers in disguise trying to infiltrate our ranks. I want to set up patrols to look for them. First patrol will be Omar, Muhammad, Abdul, Akbar,Hammed and Dave.

Love you lots, Group Hug.
Os.

PS - I'm sick of having Osama's Bed Linen scribbled on my bed sheets -Cut it out Abdul, it's not funny anymore.

C.J. · 15 May 2006, 12:28 AM

edt

JJ Irani · 15 May 2006, 05:00 AM

mailman · 15 May 2006, 08:00 AM

Goodwatch · 15 May 2006, 08:41 AM

This is beyond good, this is just Fransie's cup of chai!

padi56 · 15 May 2006, 06:26 PM

AJC · 15 May 2006, 09:14 PM

JJ Irani · 16 May 2006, 04:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Goodwatch

This is beyond good, this is just Fransie's cup of chai!

"Chai" is Hindi for tea. How did you know that?

Goodwatch · 16 May 2006, 05:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JJ Irani

"Chai" is Hindi for tea. How did you know that?

I'ts also Arabic for tea. I've been in Lebanon for 7 months and people have a real tea tradition there, part of their hospitality. It is an event, and involves a greeting by the head of the household and sitting on the floor and being served tea and food in an elaborate manner. Very, very nice!

15 May 2006, 12:09 AM	#1
padi56 "TRF" Life Patron Join Date: Jun 2005 Real Name: Peter Location: Llanfairpwllgwyng Watch: ing you. Posts: 53,045	The Cave. Subject: Cave MEMORANDUM From: Bin Laden, Osama To: All Al Quieda Fighters Subject: The Cave Hi guys. We've all been putting in long hours recently but we've really come together as a group and I love that. However, while we are fighting a jihad, we can't forget to take care of the cave. And frankly I have a few concerns - First of all, while it's good to be concerned about cruise missiles, we should be even more concerned about the dust in our cave. We want to avoid excessive dust inhalation, (a health and safety issue) - so we need to sweep the cave daily, I've done my bit on the cleaning rota........ have you? I've posted a sign-up sheet near the cave reception area (next to the halal toaster). Second, it's not often I make a video address but when I do, I'm trying to scare most of the world population, OK? That means that while we're taping, please do not ride your scooter in the background or keep doing the 'Wassup'thing. Thanks. Third: Food. I bought a box of Dairy-lea recently, clearly wrote "Ossy" on the front, and put it on the top shelf. Today, two of my Dairy-lea slices were gone. Consideration. That's all I'm saying. Fourth: I'm not against team chanting and all that, but, we must distance ourselves from the Westerner's bat and ball games...it's just not cricket. Please do not chant "Ossy Ossy Ossy, Oy Oy Oy" every time I ride past on the donkey. Thanks Five: Graffiti:Whoever wrote Ossie f#cks donkeys! on the group toilet wall please clean it off...it's a lie anyway, the donkey backed into me, whilst I was relieving myself at the edge of the mountain. Six: The use of chickens, is strictly for food. Assam, the old excuse that the "chicken backed into me, whilst I was relieving myself at the edge of the mountain" will not be accepted in future. Bestiality with non halal chicken is forbidden...there is a grey area with donkeys however. Finally, we've heard that there may be Western soldiers in disguise trying to infiltrate our ranks. I want to set up patrols to look for them. First patrol will be Omar, Muhammad, Abdul, Akbar,Hammed and Dave. Love you lots, Group Hug. Os. PS - I'm sick of having Osama's Bed Linen scribbled on my bed sheets -Cut it out Abdul, it's not funny anymore. __________________ ICom Pro3 All posts are my own opinion and my opinion only. "The clock of life is wound but once, and no man has the power to tell just when the hands will stop. Now is the only time you actually own the time, Place no faith in time, for the clock may soon be still for ever." Good Judgement comes from experience,experience comes from Bad Judgement,.Buy quality, cry once; buy cheap, cry again and again. www.mc0yad.club Second in command CEO and left handed watch winder

15 May 2006, 12:28 AM	#2
C.J. "TRF" Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: * Posts: 10,196	edt __________________ Me? I'm still looking for Kokomo. I just hope that damn golfer isn't there Last edited by C.J.; 25 May 2006 at 05:24 AM..

15 May 2006, 05:00 AM	#3
JJ Irani Fondly Remembered Join Date: May 2005 Real Name: JJ Location: Auckland, NZ Watch: ALL SOLD!! Posts: 74,319	__________________ Words fail me in expressing my utmost thanks to ALL of you for this wonderful support during my hour of need!! I firmly believe that my time on planet earth is NOT yet up!! I shall fight this to the very end.......and WIN!!

15 May 2006, 08:00 AM	#4
mailman TRF Moderator & SubLV41 2024 Patron Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: . Watch: 126610LN Posts: 35,510	__________________ JJ

15 May 2006, 08:41 AM	#5
Goodwatch "TRF" Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Real Name: Frans ® Location: Rotterdam Watch: the sunrise... Posts: 10,230	This is beyond good, this is just Fransie's cup of chai! __________________ Member# 127

15 May 2006, 06:26 PM	#6
padi56 "TRF" Life Patron Join Date: Jun 2005 Real Name: Peter Location: Llanfairpwllgwyng Watch: ing you. Posts: 53,045	__________________ ICom Pro3 All posts are my own opinion and my opinion only. "The clock of life is wound but once, and no man has the power to tell just when the hands will stop. Now is the only time you actually own the time, Place no faith in time, for the clock may soon be still for ever." Good Judgement comes from experience,experience comes from Bad Judgement,.Buy quality, cry once; buy cheap, cry again and again. www.mc0yad.club Second in command CEO and left handed watch winder

15 May 2006, 09:14 PM	#7
AJC Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Australia Posts: 1,878

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