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JohnBaker3 · 23 March 2018, 01:14 PM

Ever since I was a child, I've always had a fear of someone under my bed at night.

So I went to a shrink and told him:

“I've got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there's somebody under it. I'm scared. I think I'm going crazy.”

“Just put yourself in my hands for one year" said the shrink. "Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears.”

“How much do you charge?”

“Eighty dollars per visit,” replied the doctor.

“I'll sleep on it,” I said.

Six months later the doctor met me on the street. “Why didn't you come to see me about those fears you were having?” he asked.

“Well, eighty bucks a visit, three times a week for a year, is $12,480.00.

A bartender cured me for $10.00....

“Is that so?” With a bit of an attitude he said, “And how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?”

“He told me to cut the legs off the bed. Ain't nobody under there now!”

It's always better to get a second opinion.

cop414 · 23 March 2018, 09:11 PM

MonBK · 23 March 2018, 09:12 PM

Haha...:)

KenNethcole · 23 March 2018, 10:12 PM

BBL · 23 March 2018, 10:57 PM

John!

That's genius!

GradyPhilpott · 24 March 2018, 01:20 PM

Damned psychoanalysts.

jsg · 25 March 2018, 09:56 PM

Hairdude1 · 30 March 2018, 01:59 PM

c41006 · 30 March 2018, 02:23 PM

A few years ago I adopted a cat and the sucker went under my bed and absolutely refused to come out for anything. I put the box springs and mattress directly on the floor and problem solved!

The Joker · 30 March 2018, 10:11 PM

Paul_I · 30 March 2018, 10:16 PM

Smart bartender!

23 March 2018, 01:14 PM	#1
JohnBaker3 2024 Pledge Member Join Date: Feb 2014 Real Name: John Baker III Location: Spring,Texas Watch: 1971 Red Sub Posts: 2,222	The Psychiatrist Ever since I was a child, I've always had a fear of someone under my bed at night. So I went to a shrink and told him: “I've got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there's somebody under it. I'm scared. I think I'm going crazy.” “Just put yourself in my hands for one year" said the shrink. "Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears.” “How much do you charge?” “Eighty dollars per visit,” replied the doctor. “I'll sleep on it,” I said. Six months later the doctor met me on the street. “Why didn't you come to see me about those fears you were having?” he asked. “Well, eighty bucks a visit, three times a week for a year, is $12,480.00. A bartender cured me for $10.00.... “Is that so?” With a bit of an attitude he said, “And how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?” “He told me to cut the legs off the bed. Ain't nobody under there now!” It's always better to get a second opinion. __________________ As I've grown older, I've learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing off everyone is a piece of cake.

23 March 2018, 09:11 PM	#2
cop414 TRF Moderator & 2024 SubLV41 Patron Join Date: Apr 2012 Real Name: Tim Location: Pennsylvania Watch: 14060M Posts: 72,672	__________________ Rolex Submariner 14060M Omega Seamaster 2254.50 DOXA Professional 1200T Card carrying member of TRF's Global Association of Retro-Grouch-Curmudgeons TRF's "After Dark" Bar & NightClub Patron P Club Member #17 2 FA ENABLED

23 March 2018, 10:57 PM	#5
BBL "TRF" Member Join Date: Aug 2015 Real Name: DM Location: USA Watch: DD-YG/DJ/Breitling Posts: 8,948	John! That's genius! __________________ . People of integrity expect to be believed and when they are not they let time prove them right. A best friend is like a four leaf clover - hard to find and lucky to have. SJP

24 March 2018, 01:20 PM	#6
GradyPhilpott 2025 Pledge Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: New Mexico Watch: Seiko #SRK050 Posts: 34,476	Damned psychoanalysts. __________________ JJ Inaugural TRF $50 Watch Challenge Winner

30 March 2018, 01:59 PM	#8
Hairdude1 "TRF" Member Join Date: Apr 2012 Real Name: Alex Location: Chicago Watch: AP,PP, Rolex Posts: 37,156	__________________ Instagram: @Hairdude Watches in Collection 5070R, 5522A, 214270 MK1, 228238 16750, 26401, 5711, 116718, 116710LN, 116300, 16710"Coke", 372, 15300, 15703 (All Flipped) Official Member "Perpetual 30" Las Vegas GTG 2016 Official Member "WIS-CON" Las Vegas International GTG 2017 Official Member 'WIS-CON' Las Vegas Int'l GTG 2018

23 March 2018, 09:12 PM	#3
MonBK Banned Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Kingstown Posts: 58,277	Haha...:)

23 March 2018, 10:12 PM	#4
KenNethcole "TRF" Member Join Date: Jun 2014 Location: Socal Posts: 861

25 March 2018, 09:56 PM	#7
jsg "TRF" Member Join Date: May 2013 Real Name: J. Location: North east USA Watch: Rolex, PAM, Omega Posts: 581

30 March 2018, 02:23 PM	#9
c41006 "TRF" Member Join Date: Jan 2015 Real Name: Joshua Location: Atlanta Watch: Pelagos Posts: 7,933	A few years ago I adopted a cat and the sucker went under my bed and absolutely refused to come out for anything. I put the box springs and mattress directly on the floor and problem solved!

30 March 2018, 10:11 PM	#10
The Joker "TRF" Member Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: Gotham Posts: 9,641

30 March 2018, 10:16 PM	#11
Paul_I "TRF" Member Join Date: May 2015 Location: USA Posts: 1,448	Smart bartender! __________________

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